Douliu Hash 56 Run Report – “First Blood”

DDT and virgin hare Sweet Gnome of Alabama were March Hares again on a trail through brought us through Douliu to Gukeng in the city and on the trail.

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DDT and virgin hare Sweet Gnome Alabama were successful hares despite being barely able to dress themselves. There was a slight mishap at the finish involving a visiting Kaohsiung hasher and a bench. (Speedy recovery, Nairy Fucker!) After welcome backs, we named Mariza “Sausage Factory” for her exceptional handling of South African meat. STD had the men’s hashit. He nominated SGA for getting him drunk so he wouldn’t catch her, Glad 69 for calling him the hash devil, and Boner Bender for supporting SGA and not running. SGA won. Mother Sucker had lost the women’s hashit, but made some nominations anyway. She tagged Sleeping Dick for wrestling and throwing beer, Penis Fly Trap for her grandma bra, and Glad 69 for helping the ladies cross the river. Clearly, he needed the hashit as a consolation prize.

General penalties kicked off with Whiskey O’Clock since she was paid by SGA to get STD drunk but failed. Glad 69 followed when we realized his shirt had a gloryhole. Frozen Stiff drank for wearing his knee brace on the wrong knee. Megapixel managed to dive thigh deep in the river. STD was called out for being unable to spot the hares lying down in the road. Megapixel’s dog pissed on SGA. Kebab Muncher actually trusted Live in her Pool to make a bamboo plank. Frozen Stiff was watching the girls making out, which could actually be hash worthy behavior, but still earned him more beer. ET and BBB had made it to the ripe old age of 20 runs. BBB was quickly called back up for blinding people with her pasty white legs. Rommel Router was finally collected and deposited at down downs after he kept going the wrong way and stopped to get drunk at a 7-11. He was awarded for having 20 starts, and about 10 actual finishes. The hash cheered as Megapixel and first timer Aileen had a big tit faceoff. Mother Sucker was feeling everyone’s asses as she pushed them up the hill. We ended the night with Han’s Pizza in the park.