DDT and SpamJammer took us up and down the hills in the jungle. Our resident human megaphone CBB ran down downs. Sweet Gnome Alabama aka Laid Up was welcomed back to the island. The first and second timers shared drinks. Third timer Johan was named Lollipopup for being a “Sucker†with an ability to appear in foreign locations. Genet was named Princess Bedet for being a daddy’s girl who passed out drunk in the men’s bathroom. Tyler was named Turtle Head Peddler for being an avid cyclist who saw a spider and chose not to shit.
[do action=”iframe”]https://www.roxysbar.com/DH3/DH3-48.html[/do]
(This map is interactive; use the controls or your mouse to zoom in/out and move around)
Cunnilinguini had the women’s hashit. She nominated FR for ripping his shorts again, Mother Sucker for stealing the hashit and shoving it in her pants, and FR for ruining his shoes again. Clearly, FR needed the hashit, and we gave it to him. Mexican Dope had the men’s hashit. He nominated SGT for going on an epic shortcut, second timer Yao for doing only 2 runs in 2 years, and Absolut for not knowing if she was walking or running. We gave the hashit straight back to Mexican Dope for keeping it in the car during the run.
General penalties started with John Doe for turning left when the convoy clearly went straight. Shut the Fedora was called out for confusing his brain with his beer like a true hasher. First timer Tin Tin was putting on makeup in the car on the way to the start. BBB gave Lollipopup something to blow. PFT didn’t change into her cute little outfit. Cunnilinguini shared a parting glass with FR. DDT drank for Wrinkles being a complete dick in the river. FR drank for believing he will die when Cunnilinguini leaves. He quickly returned for noticing lizards having sex on trail. Sweet Gnome Alabama managed to catch a Scot on the way home. BBB confirmed her burping prowess. Ensnatchment was really worried about DDT’s leg. MS, SGA, and Pram Queen each had 10 runs under their belt. FR was choking Tripping Pussy with his nasty farts. Cunninlinguini downed beer from the penis cup since she reached 20 runs right as she’s leaving. SGT and Moaning Grinder found DDT’s trail map but SGT went on a shortcut to nowhere since DDT changed trail at the last minute in a feat of unprecedented sobriety. PFT and Boner Bender were forgetful drunks who signed Cunnilinguini’s shirt twice. First timers Jade and Sam drank for discussing their on trail relaxation techniques. Lollipopup and FR were peeping at CBB behind a wall. Pram Queen agreed with first timer Tom that seven bee stings on the balls would be fun. To complete her farewell, Cunnilinguini split the last three beers with FR and DDT.
No GPS trail map this month because SGT went shortcutting (or longcutting, as it turned out) and the other watch wasn’t turned off at the finish. Sorry about that. Will have to do better in September!
The next run will be on August 31st, details to follow. On On!
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